wolf

I would kill to be 
Your clothes
Cling to your body
And hang from your bones
And I can make a mark
If you would let me start

You’ve been feeling smaller
Take a different number
Like you do, like you do
When you talk about it 
You don’t want to hear it
Tell me more, tell it all, can you take it

I would kill to be the cold
Tracing your body
And shaking your bones
But I can’t sleep at night

downtown

sometimes i wish that these shadows would just disappear. that the light would just go out. that the bulb would burst and crack. just so these dark figures and silhouettes would disappear and stop haunting me. they’re always out to get me. always plotting something sinister. these trains of deep thoughts run down the same railroad and they never make the turn to leave my soul. i want to be at peace. i want to be at ease. am i ever? will the aching cease? or will i rather come to terms with the fact that i will always be hurting? anything to make this numb. anything to make it stop. i want it to stop. i want to stop.

the other side of the door

this heart pumps more than just blood. these veins carry love, hope, worries, prayers that they would continue to carry on, and frequent requests to stop functioning overall. these past few days have been filled to the brim with nothing but grief and pure insanity. i was never good with handling racing thoughts. racing heartbeats. i never was able to fully comprehend the workings of my mind. my thoughts kept intertwining with the fantasies of my heart, choking and gripping my soul. reality kept puncturing holes throughout my head. work work work. go out. study. eat. whatever it took to keep the monsters away. whatever it took for them to stop eating away at my mind. they're after me and they're out to get me, emily. and this whole time, for three weeks, i was scrambling on my knees looking for reasons and excuses to stay. but now that the cat's out of the bag, they're out to take me down. and the worst part is that i just got up. emily, i just started running.