quiet.

it's become clear to me that my identity hasn't quite surfaced yet. i realized that whenever a new being steps into my life, i force myself to shift and change according to what they're like. sometimes, i wonder if the way i am is truly who i am. i wonder if it's just another layer sitting on top of the rest that are suffocating my real identity. why am i never satisfied with what i do? why am i not able to accept things about myself? how can i accept or even tolerate the actions of others if i can barely stand the person i am? i'm not scared. i'm not scared. i'm not scared. i'm not scared. i let those three words run so swiftly through my mind, but the truth is, i am scared. i'm scared out of my fucking mind. i don't know where i am or where i'm going anymore. i've lost myself and i'm falling deep when i swore to myself that i would never let go. i wish i could be myself again, whoever that was because at least it felt comfortable being in my own skin, even though no one appreciated me. i don't know where i'm running to and i truthfully do not know where the light is anymore. i'm just hoping that somewhere, somehow, i'll find my way back. i always do.

"Even if the rain always wins and forces my eyes shut to dream of, I'll still dream of brighter days."

i will always dream of brighter days.